Every year on the third Sunday in June, people come together to celebrate fatherhood, male parenting and the importance of dads to a family. As June 21 approaches, several Squamish dads reflected on what it means to be a father.
“It’s eye-opening,” said Charlie Young, 36, and father of Alex, 4, and Poppy, 2. “I think I had my head in the sand and didn’t really think about it until we had kids. But the thing people don’t tell you before you have kids is, yes, there are challenges, but it is simply the most amazing thing that will ever happen to you. It’s more fulfilling than anything else you will ever do.”
Young said fatherhood changed his outlook on life.
“Becoming a dad four years ago changed the meaning of life… my focus,” he said. “Being a father gives your life more meaning than it had before.”
For Ray Christensen, 42, fatherhood is also about responsibility.
“All of a sudden you have to be more responsible and thoughtful, because your decisions affect a family now,” said the dad of Gracie, 12, and Carter, 9. “But from the moment my kids were born, it’s been amazing. It’s not easy, but it is lots of fun to have a family. And there are no books… you just do it.”
Christensen said a highlight of being a father is watching your children mature.
“I was recently playing golf with my son, and I was playing really badly,” he said. “But Carter kept saying things like, ‘That was a good shot, dad,’ trying to bolster my confidence. It’s amazing to see them grow.”
And kids do grow up fast, according to Bryan Raiser, 43, dad to Sarah, 10, and Rachel, 8.
“You really don’t realize it, either,” he said. “But one day you look at an old picture and you realize, whoa, they are growing up so incredibly fast.”
He said fathers have an important responsibility.
“It’s a chance to hopefully make the world a better place by helping to make a [great] person,” he said with a laugh. “Being a father also keeps you young. People look at me less weirdly for still acting like a kid and liking cartoons, candy and running, skateboarding or biking around the neighbourhood.”
Spending quality time with the family is also something Nick Rainbow, 46, equates with being a good father.
“We are a pretty close family,” said the dad of Maya, 11, and Emma, 8. “I think if you want to be a good dad, you have to be prepared to spend lots of time with your kids. I’m pretty much a doting father, and I take my kids everywhere with me. Being a father has only enhanced my life.”
Advice to new dads
Now with a bit of experience and hindsight, the fathers interviewed by The Squamish Chief offered some advice for prospective dads.
“Try to be as positive as possible,” said Young. “Try to cherish and enjoy all the moments, smiles and laughs.”
That thought was echoed by Raiser.
“It’s all the clichés,” he said. “But they are true. Appreciate every second.”
“Embrace the moment,” agreed Christensen. “But take it as it comes.”
Rainbow also advised taking a more open approach to fatherhood.
“My advice would be to go with things,” he said. “Be willing to be open. But the most important thing is to give love… the rest will take care of itself.”
Happy Father’s Day.
