Though the phrase is ever-present these days, there is likely no going “back to normal.”
We can’t just forget what has happened and feel as we did in early 2020.
There has been collective trauma from the pandemic that has impacted individuals to varying degrees.
Many in Squamish are also experiencing intense trauma and stress from the disturbing uncovering of Indigenous children in unmarked graves at residential schools.
Others are deeply impacted by the tragic recent vehicle accident that took a promising young life too soon.
With all of this to deal with, the theme of 2021 could be Year of the Walking Wounded.
Thus, how we interact with each other in Squamish is more important than ever.
The Canadian Red Cross offers valuable tips for how to help others who have experienced traumatic events in its online course Psychological First Aid (a worthwhile way to spend $20, if you can).
The course is aimed at volunteers helping folks after a disaster such as a fire, which is definitely useful these days, but its advice works during other difficult times as well.
Some of the key tips relate to ethical helping.
We must first and foremost “do no harm.”
Respect the boundaries of others — family members, friends, co-workers, neighbours, and fellow residents. Some will want to talk about what they have gone through, while others won’t.
Respect cultural differences in how people process their trauma; there is no one-size-fits-all way to move forward.
Be calm, open, and make no assumptions about others’ experiences.
Practice active listening: Look at the person and focus on exactly what they are saying; watch their body language. Nod to show you understand. Show you are comprehending what is being said with statements such as: “That must have been difficult.”
Clarify if you don’t understand something.
Don’t interrupt; allow for silence. Reassure those suffering that what they feel is valid.
Don’t judge or use “should,” statements.
Also, don’t automatically counter with your own story.
And in helping, each of us should know our limits.
Those suffering severe distress need someone trained to handle such things.
If you aren’t a therapist, in other words, don’t provide therapy.
Refer folks to the appropriate care.
The Squamish Mental Health clinic on Second Avenue is at 778-894-3200.
The Indian Residential School Survivors and Family support line is available 24/7: 1-866-925-4419.
We can’t go back, so let’s go forward, leading with compassion.
